Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Out of Time

It's like learning to walk all over again. I sit & dream of places I'd like to go & yet, these legs just won't move. Sure, I can crawl there.
I've been crawling for years.

But now I am out of time. Somehow, somewhere... the clock got sped up. And now what? I am sitting here, again, dreaming of places I want to go, and things I want to do.

Today, I am not even crawling. Today I have been reminded that I am out of time. I am stunned, almost immobilized with fear, a crawling paralysis... now I cannot move at all.
The luxury of my dreaming has had a very high price. And I cannot afford it any more. I can either get up & run, or resign myself to the fact that I am nothing but a dreamer... a dreamer that doesn't really want to walk after all, much less run.
I will not even bother to pull myself up today, I will not try to stand. The last time I tried, the rug was snatched right out from under me. 

Today, it would appear I will wallow. Wallow in self pity & self doubt. And the hard realization, that I am a dreamer whose time has come to an end.

There is no time for action, because I am out of time.

Out of my time.


  1. Beautiful.
    This expressed everything I have been feeling lately. You put it into words nicely.